Sometimes I have something to say in my mind and it sounds really good but then when I start to think about how to put it down or voice it, nothing happens. The thought process falls apart and the message turns into a pile of mush.

Tonight I was reading a post over on Eddie’s blog and it got me thinking. I guess you should never get this mind thinking. His topic was about how he needs friends who need him as much he needs them. I can really embrace this feeling. Matter of fact, I feel this exact same way sometimes. I have some really great people in my life, most of which I never get to see. I’m not sure what hinders our visitation but it sucks. Whatever happened to the days where you could just call up everyone and get together and have fun?

I have friends who are getting married now. That’s just bizarre as hell to me. Marriage is the end all of the social scene. I don’t care what they say; once they’re married, they have other stuff to worry about than coming over to hang out. My friend Britney is dear close to me but I don’t get to spend much time with her anymore because she goes to school out of town.

I mean, that’s probably my closest friend. I don’t really hang out with my sister too much anymore because she’s either working or has plans already by the time I call. So we never talk anymore. I also have Diamond but she’s got a new boyfriend so she’s pretty occupied with that all the time. I really miss being around everyone.

I look forward to going to my job because I’m around light hearted, fun people. We have a nice day with a little bit of joking and conversation while taking care of business. I guess the friends that I have are my co-workers. Perhaps that’s why I enjoyed working for Wal-Mart so much, even as bad as it was. The people there were a lot of fun.

I’m 20 years old. Am I old enough to feel like this? What the heck is going on in this world with people? Can’t things ever go back to the way they used to be? I guess times have changed and I will adjust to them eventually but it’s been a while and I am still having a hard time with it.

I miss old times.

Yeah, I’ve been having a great time at work. School has really been going okay so far so that’s good news. Rudy and I are still peachy as heck. I feel content with my life right now. It’s such a relief to be at home every night with my family. I’m glad I finally have landed myself somewhere that is possible. I realized the other day that I really miss my babies, Scooter and Sophy. Mom’s ex has them out in the middle of no where. They’re all sad I’m sure cause they’re kenneled. I miss them. Someone steal them and bring them back to me!

Rudy and I are going to get a beagle when we get our own place. Then we can have a baby to raise. Yay, lots of fun!

~Ry